Counselling and
stress management
in Southampton

Balancing and soothing

Is your life in balance? What does a good balance look like? While I believe it's up to each of us to find our own answer to this, over the years many clients have found it helpful to explore three broad states of mind during therapy.


In the green zone...
...we have ups and downs but we can think pretty clearly, our different emotions are calm enough and contained enough and wise awareness is in the driving seat. This ever-changing, integrating zone is your window of tolerance.


When life gets too much...
...we leave this middle space. In the activated red zone, our inner world gets too hot/fast. Caught in powerful and painful emotions and thoughts, we probably need to weather the storm and slow/cool down our mind. In the collapsed blue zone, life can seem too cold/slow. In this numbed-out state, we may need rest and gradually increase our energy to speed/warm things up.


It’s natural to keep moving through all three states all the time. Problems can arise when your window of tolerance gets too small and red and blue times get too big and become toxic. Therapy aims to increase your green zone of clearer thinking and calmer feeling and help you work through difficult times with more supportive resources.

Nurturing your healing balance
All counselling activities have the potential to soothe and balance your mind and so support calmer feeling and clearer thinking.


What's it like when you learn to bring more balance into your nervous system? When you learn to bring more healing, green-zone energy into your life? The video below focusses on people who experienced ongoing abuse and/or neglect during their childhood. Whether or not this history applies to you, from about 06:40 Anna Runkle describes what it can be like when people learn to bring more regulation and balance to their emotions.